Saturday, 29 December 2012

Hide in Plain Sight




Copyright Jean L. Hays
© Jean L Hays


Hide in Plain Sight

The man screamed and jerked as the cattle prods jabbed into him until he lay still.
The cloaked, hooded figures enveloped him like hungry crows, before grabbing his feet and dragging him into their black windowed van.
I leaned against my door jamb on shaking legs and watched another of my friends heading for repentance camp.
The Inquisitors were getting better at finding our sacred artefacts. I had told him simple concealment was no longer enough.
A shadow fell across my window. I froze, my hand seeking seemingly innocent contact with stained glass Air, Earth, Fire and Water.
I prayed.

100 words
@nickjohns999

This story was written for Rochelle Wisoff-Fields' Friday Fictioneers Challenge
 
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16 comments:

  1. Anonymous29 December 2012 at 21:25

    well done. my favorite are the ones that contain things that are not real, that don't exist.

    at least - not yet.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Nick29 December 2012 at 21:41

      My whole life consists of things that are not real - yet!
      Thanks for visiting!

      Delete
    2. Rochelle Wisoff-Fields29 December 2012 at 21:52

      That's called being a writer, isn't it?

      Delete
  2. Rochelle Wisoff-Fields29 December 2012 at 21:53

    Isn't that what being a writer's all about?

    ReplyDelete
  3. Rochelle Wisoff-Fields29 December 2012 at 21:55

    Dear Nick,
    This is certainly a unique take on the prompt. Applause!
    Shalom,
    Rochelle

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Nick29 December 2012 at 22:01

      Thanks Rochelle.
      Almost missed out on this prompt, as I have been out on a few emergency call outs over the holiday period. This one wanted to be a longer tale & it took me a little while to wrestle it into size! Thanks for hosting!

      Delete
  4. Rochelle Wisoff-Fields30 December 2012 at 00:29

    I've had that same wrestling match, Nick. Glad you hung in.

    ReplyDelete
  5. janet30 December 2012 at 00:37

    Glad I checked the links when I got in and saw your story. Hope your new year is much less distressing than this. :-)

    janet

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Nick30 December 2012 at 06:41

      Thanks Janet.
      I always try to make each New Year a good one, ever conscious that it's the only one I'm going to be able to make improvements in!
      :-)

      Delete
  6. Sandra Crook30 December 2012 at 17:58

    Excellent; just the right amount of detail to tantalise and horrify. Glad you made it.

    ReplyDelete
  7. tedstrutz30 December 2012 at 18:33

    Well this was a surprise (welcome, I might add)... I'm thinking his concealment was in plain sight. Good one!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Nick30 December 2012 at 20:58

      Thanks Ted.
      The four elements were my first thought when I saw the photo.

      Delete
  8. Douglas MacIlroy31 December 2012 at 05:12

    Dear Nick,

    This was well conceived. The touching of the elements, innocent yet potent, added the perfect ending to this tale.

    Aloha,

    Doug

    ReplyDelete

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