Here’s the link; http://youtu.be/1nP3XB7hrFo
“This is all
your bloody fault!”
I reached for
her hand but she bunched it into a fist and pulled away.
She stalked off,
her haughty pose only slightly diminished by being soaking wet and having to carry
her shoes.
I trudged in her
wake, slipping on the wet sand.
“Miranda!” I
wailed
“Bugger off”,
her wind-blown retort.
The cliff face
stopped her where I couldn’t.
“Please
Darling...”
“You can’t even
sink a boat properly. Not a path for miles. I suppose you expect me to slog
along this desolate beach until we reach some meagre sign that civilisation actually
exists in this arse end of creation?”
“Well I can’t
carry you, Babe. But I suppose could go off and look for a way up the cliff.
Come back when I’ve found it...”
“... and leave
me here, alone, at the mercy of who knows what, whilst you meander along,
looking for seashells and forgetting why you started to walk along the beach in
the first place? No bloody thanks.”
“But I know this
pl...”
“What! Did you
plan this fiasco? Is this your lame brained idea of a romantic destination?
Well, let me tell you, Sunshine, you’re no Mr Darcy when it comes to romance –
or anything else in that area. How do you know this place anyway? Have you been
bringing other tarts here?... Is that it?... It is, isn’t it? Oh you
unspeakable bastard! You little worm!”
“Miranda...”
“Don’t you
Miranda me, Sonny Boy. When I get off this god forsaken beach the first person
I’ll be speaking to is my lawyer. In fact there’s no point you leaving here at
all – a driftwood hut on the foreshore is all you’ll be able to afford when I’ve
finished with you.”
“Look,
Dearest...”
“What? Where? Out
of the way. Let me see. Oh yes, I see. Looks like someone’s waving at us from
that cave.Why don’t they bloody well come over here then?”
“Perhaps we could
climb in... there...it’s not too steep”
“Well I made it, but no thanks to you. Now where are these waving people?
Shine a light. Go on! Flick your lighter or something! How peculiar. They look
like statues... of women. Damn, it’s cold in here. Give me your jacket!”
“Here, Sweetness. I’ll wrap this around you.”
“That stupid gossamer whisper of a thing? Are you a complete idiot, or
are you still practicing? What good is that going to do? It’s just like the
statues have draped over them. Fat lot of good it did them.”
“Multiple layers Munchkin. Keep some heat in whilst I get you my
jacket...”
“Oh very well, just hurry up about it...”
“Here now, if I just drape it over your head as well, just so.... perfect.
Am I a complete idiot? No Darling, but I have an ancient and effective way of
dealing with wives who become... tiresome. Meet your new sisters, my other
exes. Say hello. Oh, I forgot, you can’t. Not anymore. Bye Bye Miranda.”
500 words
@nickjohns999
This story was written for Jeff Tsuroka’s Mid Week
Blues Buster and was inspired by the music prompt – ‘Stay’ by Hurts
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