Friday 25 January 2013

Stairway to Heaven

Photo Source


Stairway to Heaven

His calves burned. His breath came in raw ragged gasps. Blood of a thousand falls slicked his palms and streaked the dank walls he leaned on for support. One bruised, aching foot after another he screwed up the feeble vestiges of his remaining courage and trudged towards the sweet shining promise of the light. He barely dared number the remaining treads lest they prove a cruel uncountable Escher trick of his rheumy, sweat stained eyes. He yearned for the surcease of a cool breeze, unpolluted by his own ever present stench; the sound of the open, not echoes of his own desperate progress, the sights soaring aloft on the wings of a distant horizon, not sight of more rough hewn walls. Soft bludgeons of sleep battered his resolve and, weeping, defeated, he fell before them. Awake, crushed beneath the weight of familiar darkness, he once more began his allotted climb.

150 words
@nickjohns999
This story was written for Angela Goff’s ever excellent Visual Dare challenge


4 comments:

  1. O goodness. Why does the story of Tantalus come to mind here? This sounds like the most inexorable torment - to be that close, slip, and return to the beginning again! The phrase "a cruel uncountable Escher trick" really nailed it for me. Such tension and heartbreak in one well-crafted fist. Well done!!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi Angela. Thanks. Yes the story has elements of Tantalus with dash of Sisyphus. Another great prompt photo, with such a different feel from the lighter tone suggested by last week's offering.

      Delete
  2. Well Nick, that's it for me. How can I possibly write a Visual Dare response after reading yours? This is deliciously written; the cadence and usage is beautiful. I felt like I was alongside this fellow as he journeyed up the steps and then began his journey again. A most wonderful use of 150 words!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Wow, thanks Jo-Anne! To get such feedback from a poet, for whom careful and measured use of words is vital, is wonderful.

      Delete